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Writer's picture M S CHARAN

Emotional Intelligence and Personal Growth: Harnessing Emotions for Self-Improvement


While intelligence as measured by IQ tests remains as an influential factor in understanding human capabilities, it alone cannot predict success in life. There is a different kind of intelligence, known as Emotional Intelligence (EQ), that is a more reliable predictor of success, both professionally and personally.


THEORIES OF EMOTION


1. James-Lange

James and Lange put forward the theory separately yet at around the same time. Both believed that an emotional reaction is simply impossible without experiencing a physical reaction first.

For example, fear would be the adrenaline rush and for sadness, it would be the slowing down of the metabolism that triggers the brain into the emotive response.


2. Walter Cannon

  • Walter Cannon came along with a belief that a person did not necessarily need stimulation from the physical body in order for a subject to feel emotion.

  • He carried out a number of experiments on animals that showed an emotional reaction despite the body and brain connection being temporarily disabled.

3. Schachter and Singer

  • Stanley Schachter and Jerome Singer later proposed another theory. This one was based upon the brain and bodily response needing to work together in order to create and recognize an emotion.

  • Their theory stated that something such as the heart is racing could be both interpreted as fear or excitement dependent on the scenario. Therefore, within this theory, the brain itself plays part in emotional response


4. Cognitive Labelling

  • The cognitive labelling theory is also from Stanley Schachter and Jerome Singer and places importance on the thought processes that label emotion.

  • It is this theory that acknowledges the link between learned emotions and the labels that the storage areas in the mind give to them.

  • With labels of emotion, the thought becomes an emotion yet without the label, the thought simply stays as a thought in this theory.

5. The Opponent-Process Theory


The opponent-process theory of emotion was then developed by two psychologists called Richard Solomon and John Corbit.

The idea with this theory is that each emotion has an opposite one and whilst one is triggered, the other is switched off, leaving the body and person, as a whole, off balance. The process completes by the dormant emotion switching back on.

An example of this would be fear and relief.


6. Aristotle's Theory of Emotions

According to Aristotle, emotions are split into two types:

  • Emotions that are not too emotionally charged and that we can control, which is known to be cognition.

  • Emotions that are too emotionally charged to be controlled at all. This is an early description of what we now know to be emotional hijacking.

Anger caused by unjustified slight of respect towards the individual or loved ones of the individual. He believed the slight to be of three types:

  • Contempt

  • Spite

  • Insolence

Anger caused by unjustified slight of respect towards the individual or loved ones of the individual. He believed the slight to be of three types:

  • Contempt

  • Spite

  • Insolence

Aristotle also gave the settling of anger a term of its own, which he labelled mildness.

  • Love is an emotion that wants the best for someone else.

  • Hatred is a type of anger directed against a class of individual or group.

  • Fear is a painful mental disturbance associated with pending damage of some sort.

  • Confidence is the absence of fear and the presence of hope.

  • Shame is a mental disturbance related to a past or present evil.

  • Shamelessness offers contempt towards a past or present evil.

  • Benevolence is disinterest in the presence of kindness or towards the person offering the act of kindness.

  • Pity is a sense of sorrow based upon the awareness of pain to something or someone that does not deserve it.

  • Indignation is a negative response to undeserved good fortune bestowed upon someone else.

  • Envy is seen as a mental disturbance at the good fortune of others. This is different to coveting the exact good fortune.

  • Emulation is similar to jealousy where a person feels mental disturbance for goods that someone else has but they do not.

  • Contempt is the opposite to emulation.

The Mind:

  • The feeling mind is the area of emotion in the mind and in neuroscience, this is called the limbic system.

  • The storage area is everything that the mind has stored since birth.

  • The thinking mind is the area of the brain that developed last and is the logical and human area. This is where your personality is stored.

  • The thinking and the feeling mind both store things in the storage area and all three usually work together pretty well.

Thinking Mind:

  • The frontal area is the area of the brain that collects facts, is logical in its decisions and ultimately responsible for thoughts and behavior that don’t include highly emotional reactions or actions of the more primitive, survival-focused area of the brain and the mind.

  • When we use the frontal lobe area of the brain, we increase blood flow to it. In brain scans, this can be seen quite clearly.

  • The entire frontal area of the brain is classed as more than one lobe and is, in fact, a collection of areas within the frontal lobe. The brain area reacts to stimulus by communicating with the opposite side of the face and body.

  • The prefrontal cortex is the exact area that we are looking at when looking at how the brain can help or hinder communication.

Feeling:

  • The feeling area of the mind is based in the limbic area and, interestingly, this is also the wildest, oldest area of the human brain. The limbic area and its fears have kept us alive and evolving long enough that we could grow a logical brain - the thinking area.

  • The limbic area of the brain is linked to instinct. Emotional outbursts are also linked to this area, as is aggression, without the guiding frontal area of the brain.

  • The limbic system is quite vast and consists of the following:

  • The amygdala is involved in emotional responses, hormonal travel and some related memory. The amygdala is responsible for fear conditioning or the associative learning process by which we learn to fear something.

  • The cingulate gyrus deals with sensory input and how it relates to aggressive behavior.

  • The fornix are the nerve fibres that bridge the next two brain areas.

  • The hippocampus is a memory index of the brain. It sorts out which memories are stored.

  • The hypothalamus is the emotional control centre and the centre of adrenaline.

  • The olfactory cortex aids scent recognition and memory.

  • The thalamus that relays sensory information between the brain and the spinal cord.

Storage:

  • Biologically speaking, this is not a single area in the brain but spread out between both the thinking and the feeling mind.

  • As the brain is developing, we go through learning stages and each of these stages places specific beliefs into our storage area.

  • The human brain is literally a sponge and will consider everything that happens to us from the moment we are born as a belief of reality. For example, if we are left to cry as very small children, the storage area will quickly create a belief that people cannot be trusted to take care of our basic needs.

EMOTIONAL HIJACKING:

Emotional hijacking is prevalent throughout life. How often have you lost your temper, shouted at a stranger or done something equally unplanned that made you feel bad afterwards?

This is emotional hijacking in action and it accounts for a lot of the social problems that we deal with on a daily basis, not only as individuals but also as society as a whole.


The amygdala, which is involved in emotional responses, is labelled as the emotional hijacker of the brain by psychologist Daniel Goleman.

The Amygdala:

  • The amygdala is so small yet highly powerful.

  • This tiny, almond-sized area in the brain is responsible for signaling emotional responses along with, to an extent, storing emotional memory. This area of the brain has a lot of responsibility where emotional learning is concerned.

  • The response associated with classical conditioning takes place in the amygdala and if it is damaged or not functioning properly, the fear response will be slower or non-existent.

Classical Conditioning

Russian scientist Ivan Pavlov made a historical discovery around the 1900s whilst conducting his classical conditioning experiments with dogs. Classical conditioning (sometimes known as Pavlovian conditioning) refers to situations where automatic reactions become elicited by conditioned stimuli in addition to the unconditioned stimuli that normally elicit them.


Understanding Emotional Intelligence


Emotional Intelligence refers to our ability to identify, interpret, and manage emotions within ourselves and others. It consists of five core components:

  • Self-awareness: Recognizing our emotions as they occur and understanding how they impact our thoughts and behaviors.

  • Self-regulation: Controlling our impulses and managing our emotional reactions in different situations.

  • Motivation: Being driven to pursue goals even in the face of adversity.

  • Empathy: Understanding the emotions of others, and responding appropriately.

  • Social skills: Building healthy relationships, navigating social situations, and effectively handling the emotions of others.

The significance of EQ over IQ in achieving success


Unlike IQ, which is a measure of academic intelligence, EQ is flexible and can be nurtured and developed. It influences our ability to effectively communicate, manage stress, overcome challenges, and defuse conflicts. The importance of EQ is particularly noticeable in leadership roles, where emotional intelligence is recognized as a critical factor in building effective teams, cultivating positive work culture, and making impactful decisions. Hence, improving EQ has the potential to unlock unparalleled success in various facets of life.


Pillars of Emotional Intelligence


Emotional Intelligence is often misunderstood as merely recognizing and managing one's own emotions, but it's more complex and nuanced. It is underpinned by four core pillars namely, Self-Awareness, Self-Management, Social Awareness, and Relationship Management. Let's delve into each pillar to understand its significance.


Self-Awareness

The first pillar, self-awareness, acts as the fundamental cornerstone of Emotional Intelligence. Recognizing yourself as an emotional being and understanding the effect of your feelings on your thoughts and actions is what forms this crucial component. People rich in self-awareness tend to:

  • Recognize and understand their own emotions

  • Understand the triggers and influences of their emotions

  • Know how their emotions affect their decisions and actions

  • Identify their strengths, weaknesses, and potential areas for growth

Understanding oneself allows you to make purposeful decisions, suiting not only your immediate needs but also aligning with your long-term objectives.


Self-Management


The ability to manage one's emotions, especially in stressful situations, contributes to the second pillar - Self-Management. Those skilled in self-management:

  • Regulate their feelings constructively

  • Handle stress and changes effectively

  • Display resilience in the face of adversity

  • Stay composed and positive even in challenging situations

Rather than letting emotions steer their actions, individuals with robust self-management skills take charge to maintain equilibrium, leading to more effective communication and problem-solving capabilities.


Social Awareness

Social Awareness, the third pillar, involves the ability to understand and respond suitably to others' emotions. It's empathy in action. Socially aware individuals:

  • Recognize and acknowledge others' emotions

  • Show empathy and understanding for others' perspectives

  • Navigate social networks and interactions effectively

They have the knack to pick up on emotional cues, adjust their approach accordingly, and respond in a manner that fosters better engagements and cooperation.


Relationship Management

The fourth pillar, Relationship Management, banks on the former three, translating them into action during interactions. Effective managers of relationships:

  • Form positive, productive relationships

  • Manage conflicts and seek resolution

  • Communicate effectively

  • Influence and inspire others

This pillar highlights EQ's role in leadership and teamwork, fostering a healthy, constructive environment for personal and professional growth.


Emotional Intelligence in daily life


Emotional Intelligence consists of four critical components: self-awareness, social awareness, self-management, and relationship management. Incorporating these facets into our daily lives can vastly benefit our personal interactions as well as decision-making processes.


The role of self-awareness in personal and professional decisions


Self-awareness underpins the concept of emotional intelligence. It empowers us to recognize and comprehend our own emotions and the ways they influence our thoughts and actions. Making room for self-reflection aids in understanding our strengths, weaknesses, and triggers. Professionally, self-awareness guides us to identify challenges and opportunities, which can significantly improve decision-making and performance.


Guiding principles of effective communication through Emotional intelligence


Effective communication is pivotal to productive personal and professional relationships. Utilizing emotional intelligence in communication enables us to convey our thoughts clearly, listen actively, and handle conflicts gracefully. Key principles include:

  • Being attentive and receptive to others' viewpoints

  • Constructively expressing one's thoughts and emotions

  • Manifesting empathy and respect for others' feelings and experiences

Emotional Intelligence in a Leadership Role

Emotional Intelligence, often abbreviated as EQ, is paramount for leaders in any field as it enables them to comprehend their emotions and the emotions of those around them. This understanding plays a crucial role in not only leading a team but also making critical decisions and ensuring organizational success.

EQ in Leading a Team


EQ is an invaluable asset when leading a team. It allows the one in a leadership role to:

  • Effectively communicate and articulate their vision

  • Empathize with team members and understand their needs

  • Create a supportive and productive work environment

These facets of EQ encourage a positive and engaging team dynamic, thus promoting better work output.


EQ in Decision-Making, Conflict Resolution and Organizational Success


EQ also takes center stage in the decision-making process. Leaders with high EQ are able to consider the feelings and perspectives of others in their choices, fostering inclusiveness within the organization. In volatile situations or conflict resolution, Emotional Intelligence facilitates understanding differing perspectives, ensuring fair solutions and maintaining harmonious relationships. Moreover, the success of an organization hinges upon healthier employee relationships and increased productivity, both influenced by EQ.


Connection between Emotional Intelligence and Potential


Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is not just about understanding and empathizing with others' emotions, but also about managing our own. It is an essential factor in our personal and professional growth.


How EQ Impacts Personal and Professional Growth


Notably, EQ plays a significant role in self-awareness, relationship management, and effective communication, all of which are pivotal elements in both personal and professional arenas.

  • Self-awareness enables us to understand our emotions, strengths, weaknesses, values, and motivations. It contributes to the cultivation of resilience and confidence, which aids us in encountering life challenges.

  • In relationship management, EQ helps us build stronger, more fulfilling connections with others, fostering collaboration and team spirit in professional environments.

  • When it comes to effective communication, EQ aids us in expressing ourselves clearly, persuasively, and empathetically, enhancing our professional relationships and personal bonds.

Conclusion


Emotional Intelligence (EQ) goes beyond our basic intellectual capability. It encapsulates skills such as:

  • Self-awareness: Our ability to recognize and understand our own emotions and how they affect our thoughts and behavior.

  • Empathy: The capacity to comprehend the emotions and emotional responses of others.

  • Effective communication: The capability to express our thoughts and feelings coherently, as well as understand those of others.

  • Relationship management: Our knack in maintaining healthy relationships by effectively handling interpersonal situations and conflicts.

  • EQ's profound influence on our personal growth and leadership potential cannot be understated. With it, we can harness our emotions positively, improve social relationships and enhance our performance at work.



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